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Abbott and Costello Meet
Frankenstein (1948)
- a classic horror-comedy hybrid
film about two Florida train station baggage handling clerks: Chick
Young (Bud Abbott) and Wilbur Grey (Lou Costello) - unsuspecting
delivery men who unknowingly delivered
monsters in crates to McDougals' House of Horror wax museum
- the great casting of a multitude of Universal's
horror characters, including Frankenstein (Glenn Strange), Dracula
(Bela Lugosi), and Lawrence Talbot/Wolfman (Lon Chaney, Jr.)
- the slapstick scene of Wilbur removing one piece
of luggage from a cart, and sending the whole load of cargo onto
his head
- the scene of Wilbur's phone call with Larry Talbot/the
Wolf Man, mistaking the Monster's transformation (and his noisy
growls and snarls) as bad manners: "Mr. McDougal, will
you stop gargling your throat? Hey, you'll have to get
your dog away from the phone, I can't hear a word you're sayin'.
You're awful silly to call me all the way from London just to have
your dog talk to me"
- after almost crashing the large crate containing
Dracula's sarcophagus, Wilbur's joke to McDougal (Frank Ferguson)
about working for two unions: "Well,
that's gonna cost ya overtime because I'm a union man and I work
only sixteen hours a day";
when corrected:
"A union man only works eight hours a day", Wilbur noted: "I
belong to two unions"
- the many
scenes of Wilbur foolishly in love with diabolical mad lady scientist
Dr. Sandra Mornay (Lenore Aubert), who only wanted to operate on
him in a laboratory to acquire his ideal and simple "brain"
- Wilbur's hysterically beserk reactions to
terror and fright - when he saw a hand draped out of Dracula's coffin,
but then when he claimed
he saw Dracula or that a candlestick moved on its own, partner
Chick was disbelieving because the coffin was empty
- the funny revolving door sequence with the monsters
on one side of the turning wall
- the hilarious response by Wilbur to Larry Talbot's
admission of lycanthropy (turning into a beast in the light of
a full moon): "You
and 20 million other guys"
- the masquerade costume
ball sequence in which the monsters were unnoticed among the guests
in Dracula's castle
- Wilbur's chastisement of the Wolf Man, thinking
it was Chick with a mask-disguise: "Didn't Mr. Talbot tell
you not to put that mask on anymore? Now, what'd you put it on
for? Take the mask off! Come on!"
- the curtain-closing appearance of The Invisible
Man (voice of Vincent Price) in a rowboat ("Oh, that's too
bad, I was hoping to get in on the excitement.... Allow
me to introduce myself. I'm the Invisible Man") after Chick
assured Wilbur that there would no more excitement: "Now that
we've seen the last of Dracula, the Wolf Man, and the Monster,
there's nobody to frighten us anymore"
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About Last Night... (1986)
- from a screenplay by David Mamet titled "Sexual
Perversity in Chicago"
- the lengthy opening sequence
(with the characters appearing on-screen and then alternating with
voice-over dialogue over blue-on-black title credits) in which slobbish,
sexist, vulgar, loud-mouthed and self-assured pal Bernie Litko (James
Belushi) and co-worker pal Danny Martin (Rob Lowe) were walking around
various locales in Chicago as Bernie told his enthralled friend
about his previous night's outrageous and wild sexual adventure,
involving, among other things:
-
a 20 (or 19) year-old "broad" at
a pancake house for whom he bought a pack of Viceroy cigarettes
-
she may or may not have been a 'pro'
-
she decided they should both go to
her room so she could pay him back
-
she invited him to take a shower
with her (and then "f--k")
- enthralled
by her tits, ass, and legs, he delivered a welcomed towel flick
on her ass (producing a red mark and a squeal) and she proceeded
to put on a World War II flak suit (from a suitcase under the bed)
-
as
they were making love on her bed, while he cried out "Boom" every
30 seconds and a tape recorder played "airplane noises" (rat-a-tat-tat),
she then set herself on fire with a Zippo lighter after dousing
herself with gasoline during an aerial bomber reenactment, screaming: "Give
it to me now,
for the love of Christ!"
- firemen arrived from the Chicago Fire Department
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About Schmidt (2002)
- the landmark, infamous, much-talked about nude hot
tub scene, when divorced, sexually-liberated,
free-spirited, middle-aged, and overweight Roberta Hertzel (Kathy
Bates), the mother of the groom-to-be, casually stepped into
the tub naked - causing astonishment on the face of recently-retired
and widowed actuary Warren Schmidt (Jack Nicholson) - the father
of the bride; she greeted him: "Here we are, a divorcee and a widower.
Sounds like a perfect match to me!" and reached out to touch
his leg under the bubbling water; he immediately exited the hot-tub
as she asked: "What's the matter?" He gave an obvious excuse: "Oh,
I have to go to bed now"; she was astonished: "Just like that?
Come on. We were havin' such a nice talk"; he added: "I'm all tuckered
out"
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Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
(1994)
- the character of manic, rubber-faced "pet dick"
Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey), with dozens of animals in his apartment
- his screaming
out of "It's
Alive!" as
he started his dilapidated 1970s Chevrolet Monte Carlo
- the infamous butt talking
scene ("Excuse me, I'd like to 'ass' you a few questions")
- the montage of Ace searching for a 1984 AFC Championship
ring (with a missing cut amber stone) on athletes' fingers, although
every ring he looked at was intact
- the scene of Ace knocking on a door when a sliding
window opened - and he asked: "Hi, I'm looking for Ray Finkle" (the
ex-Miami Dolphin's disgraced field goal kicker) and a shotgun was
pointed at his head - he nervously added: "...and a clean
pair of shorts"
- the
bathroom scene of Ace accidentally feeding a shark in a tank rather
than the dolphin
- Ace's dressing in a tutu and pretending to be a
traumatized ex-footballer living out his last game (complete with
slow-mos and instant replays), in order to get into the Shady Acre
mental hospital (where Finkle had been committed), and to enter
the storage room of patients' belongings
- the plot-twist solution - when Ace was on the trail
of a missing and abducted bottlenose dolphin (named Snowflake -
the mascot of the Miami Dolphins); he realized, to his dismay,
that potential suspect Ray Finkle was actually transgendered female Miami Police
Lieutenant Lois Einhorn! (Sean Young): "That's it!
Einhorn is Finkle, Finkle is Einhorn! Einhorn is a man. Oh, my
God! Einhorn is a man!"
- in the finale at a yacht storage facility, the revelation
that Finkle was indeed Einhorn (with his penis tucked between his
legs), and that he/she had the ring missing the stone
- at the climactic 1994 Super Bowl game, the confrontation
and fight between Ace and the Philadelphia Eagles' green-feathered
mascot Swoop
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Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls
(1995)
- the scene of Ace Ventura (Jim
Carrey) hiding in an animatronic rhinoceros ("I'm just a curious
little rhino")
in order to spy on one of his suspects in the theft of an albino
bat - and then discovering the cooling system had failed ("Kinda
hot in these rhinos...Warm"),
forcing him to strip completely and squeeze himself out of the
rhino's birth canal in order to get out - in full view of a group
of shocked American safari tourists who thought they were witnessing
a rhino birth!
- the sequence of his arrival at a bat cave, when
Ace was shocked to find he was on an expedition to find a rare
white bat - a sacred tribal animal; he acted out his fear: "You
didn't say anything about a bat!...Have you ever seen a bat? They're
hideous. Lifeless, beady eyes, clawed feet, huge grotesque wings.
Even fangs. They give you rabies, you know....As a being of light,
I must show compassion for all the living things of nature...
I'm not touching it, though! No, spank you"
- Ace's fight scene with the Wachati tribe's short
statured tribal champion, the Tiny Warrior (Tommy Davidson), who
jumped out of a backpack: (Ace (astonished): "This is it? I have
to beat him?
Allrighty, then! I must tell you. I do not wish to fight you. Violence
is no longer in my nature, but if you want it, you got it,
sister"); when Ace went to punch the Tiny Warrior, he was bitten
in the fist, and he exclaimed: "Biting, I see. I was unaware that
the Wachootoos were biters!"; then, Ace taunted the warrior: "I'll
have you know I have the reflexes of a cat. And the speed of a
mongoose. Throw it! I dare ya!" but then was speared in the upper
right thigh; when speared in both legs, he cried out: "It's in
the bone, it's in the bone" and fell down, causing the natives
to laugh out loud
- the scene of Ace making shadow
puppets on the screen in the projection room
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Adam's
Rib (1949)
- the opening scene of 'dumb
blonde' defendant Doris Attinger (Judy Holliday) trailing her philandering,
two-timing husband Warren (Tom Ewell) - and fumbling within her
purse to take out her deadly pistol and also remove an instruction
manual to learn how to release the safety catch
- the scenes of happily-married
lawyers, now dueling lawyers: chauvinistic District Attorney Adam
Bonner (Spencer Tracy) and his savvy wife/defense lawyer Amanda
Bonner (Katharine Hepburn) on opposing sides of a murder case squaring
off against each other in their personal lives at home; (i.e.,
- Adam's first learning of his wife's role as defense
attorney against him: "I'm going to defend her" - (he
toppled a tray of drinks); he later complained: "The one case
I don't want is the case I get"
- during a massage session: Adam: "What
are you - sore about a little slap?" and
her reply: "I know a slap from a slug"
- the scene in the defendant's jail
cell with her attorney Amanda when Doris delivered her entire rendition
of the events of the day of the shooting -- punctuated with eating
episodes (two rare hamburgers and lemon meringue pie, for instance)
- the scene of Doris' speech in court to defend herself,
and Amanda's impassioned closing argument to the jury: "Every living
being is capable of attack if sufficiently provoked. Assault lies
dormant within us all. It requires only circumstance to set it
in violent motion. I ask you for a verdict of not guilty. There
was no murder attempt here - only a pathetic attempt to save a
home"
- in the final classic lines of the film, the Bonners
reached a mutual understanding and finally admitted that there
was really only one fundamental difference between the sexes (Adam: "Vive
la difference")
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Airplane! (1980)
- the film's many effective puns,
sight gags, parodies, wordplays, and other jokes, beginning with
the opening credits sequence set to the familiar music of Jaws
(1975)
with the plane's fin emerging through the clouds
- the Airport '75
(1974) spoof scene of the singing of River of Jordan by
air stewardess Randy (Lorna Patterson) while continually knocking
out the I-V drip for transplant patient (Jill Whelan) - on the way
to the Mayo Clinic who desperately struggled during the song
- also
the deadpanned, sexually-prurient and provocative lines by Captain
Clarence Oveur (Peter Graves) to young boy Joey, among others: "You
ever been in the cockpit before...You ever seen a grown man naked?" and "Joey,
do you ever hang around a gymnasium? Do
you like movies about gladiators?" and "Joey, have you
ever been in a Turkish prison?"
- the plentiful puns: ("Surely, you can't be serious!" "I
am serious , and don't call me 'Shirley'!")
- the continuing confusion
of the pilot's "Roger" with his own navigator Roger Murdock
(Kareem Abdul-Jabbar) while talking to ground control;
and the cross-talk airplane cockpit talk: "We have clearance,
Clarence. Roger, Roger. What's our Vector, Victor?"
- flight attendant Elaine
Dickinson's (Julie Hagerty) question over the PA: ("By the way,
is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?")
- the infamous hysterical passenger (Lee Bryant) joke
(the passengers were in line to slap her with various implements)
- the equally notorious "fellatio"
scene in which Elaine was given directions by air-traffic control
to reinflate Otto the Autopilot doll (an inflatable plastic life-sized
human in a pilot suit, humorously credited as HIMSELF) by blowing
air into a nozzle in his belt buckle: ("On the belt
line of the automatic pilot there's a tube. Now that is the
manual inflation nozzle. Take it out and blow on it") --
Otto suddenly sported a huge satisfied grin and later both Otto
and Elaine smoked cigarettes
- the "Oh stewardess, I
speak jive" scene
when elderly passenger Jive Lady (Barbara Billingsley) offered
to translate the jive talk of two black passengers to the flight
attendant: ("Cut
me some slack, Jack!... Chump don't want no help, chump don't
GET da' help!")
- the line spoken by a little girl when offered cream
for her coffee: "I take it black...like my men"
- drug-addicted air traffic worker McCroskey's (Lloyd
Bridges) running gag:
"It looks like I picked the wrong day/week to quit smoking / drinking
/ amphetamines / sniffing glue"
- the spoof of the disco-era Saturday Night Fever
(1977) in the flashback scene when ex-Air Force pilot Ted
Striker (Robert Hays) and stewardess girlfriend Elaine were obliviously dancing to the Bee Gee's "Stayin'
Alive" in the place where they first met - a Casablanca-style
bar in Drambuie off the Barbary Coast
- Ted's passionate kiss with Elaine on the beach
while covered in kelp - a spoof of From Here
to Eternity (1953)
- the post-credits comment by a long-suffering abandoned
cab passenger (Howard Jarvis) still waiting for cab driver Striker
at the LAX airport: ("Well,
I'll give him another 20 minutes, but that's it")
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Alice
Adams (1935)
- the classic,
tragically funny, disastrous dinner-party scene, in which aspiring,
pretentious Alice (Katharine Hepburn) hopelessly wished to rise
up above the low-social prominence of her vulgar, poor family to
impress her rich new suitor Arthur Russell (Fred MacMurray) by
inviting him to a "stylish" dinner party at
her own home - in the wilting humidity and heat - served by the part-time
hired black servant/cook Malena (Hattie McDaniel)
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All of Me (1984)
- the clever role-reversal comedy with physical slapstick
comedy performed by its comedy stars Steve Martin and Lily Tomlin as
two parts or personalities of the same person (a left male side and
right female side)
- one was unhappy lawyer and jazz musician Roger Cobb
(Martin) and the other was his wealthy, dying invalid client/spinster
Edwina Cutwater (Tomlin) - whose soul transmigrated into Roger's
body through the misguided efforts of befuddled, incomprehensible
but beatific Tibetan shaman/mystic Prahka Lasa (Richard Libertini)
- and who could only be seen in mirrors
- the hilarious scenes in
which Roger fought with his female half whenever he did anything
(such as drive, walk down the street, or make love)
- the scene
in which he had to go to the bathroom at a urinal, and he tried
to teach his half-female body what to do (Edwina was instructed
to "tap" afterwards)
- the tug-of-war
as they attempted to walk down the street together ("First
me, then you, me, you, me, you...")
- the courtroom scene
during divorce proceedings for his boss in which Edwina eventually
took control and won the case for the wife - while representing
the husband/boss!
- also, the crazy and crowd-pleasing song-and-dance
number to "All
of Me" in the end credits when the two of them danced together
in a mirror's reflection ("Okay, try it with your own feet")
-- culminating with them toppling over each other
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American Pie (1999)
- a humorous sex farce and gross-out
teen comedy (with the slogan: "You never forget your first
slice!"); the film's title was derived from a high-schooler's
question: "What
exactly does third base feel like?" and the answer: "Like
warm apple pie"
- the opening scene of horny high-school teen Jim
Levinstein (Jason Biggs) masturbating himself with a long athletic
tube sock while watching scrambled porn on pay-TV, but was caught
by both of his parents, who were shocked by the dialogue they were
hearing from the TV: "Baby! Ride me like a pony!"
and "Oh, spank my hairy ass!"
- the scene of Jim's experimentation with the feel
of warm, freshly-baked apple pie and being discovered pumping the
pastry on the kitchen island by his stunned dad (Eugene Levy) -
and his embarrassing excuse: ("It's not what it looks like");
their solution to cover up the damage: "Well....we'll just
tell your mother that uh, that uh, we ate it all"
- the scene of Jim's awkward sex-education session
with his well-meaning father, who offered a selection of dirty
magazines and instructed him to go to the center section: "Well,
you see the detail that, uh, that they go into in this picture
here.... It almost looks like a tropical plant or something, underwater
- thing"; his father also asked: "Do you know what a
clitoris is?"; slightly later was another frank session about
masturbation: "Jim, I want to talk about masturbation. Now,
I just want you to know that it's - it's a perfectly normal, uh,
thing. And I have to admit, uh, you know. I, uh, did a fair bit
of masturbating when I was a little younger. I, uh, I used to call
it 'stroking the salami'. Yeah, you know, 'pounding the ol' pud.'
I never did it with baked goods, uh, but you know your Uncle Mort?
He pets 'the one-eyed snake' five, six times a day. See, it's like,
uh, practice for the big game. You see? And it's like, it's like,
uh, banging a tennis ball against a brick wall, which can be fun.
It can be fun, but it's not a game...What you want is, you want
a partner to return the ball"
- Jim's online voyeuristic experience (and encounter)
with foreign Czech exchange student Nadia (Shannon Elizabeth),
who was using his bedroom, while he spied on her undressing and
masturbating through a hidden video-camera at his friend's home,
where Paul Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas) commented: "God bless
the Internet"; a web-cam was broadcasting everything to the
entire school, and although she was prepared to have sex with Jim,
he prematurely ejaculated twice and became completely humiliated
- the scene of Vicky Lathum (Tara Reid) being given
oral sex in her bedroom by her boyfriend Kevin Myers (Thomas Ian
Nicholas), as she loudly yelled out: "I'm coming!" while
her clueless father stood outside her door, shrugged his shoulders,
and then continued downstairs
- Jim's discussion with openly-sexual band camp geek
and prom date Michelle Flaherty (Alyson Hannigan) who admitted:
"This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy...What
? You don't think I know how to get myself off? Hell, that's what
half of band camp is -- Sex Ed. So are we gonna screw soon, 'cause
I'm gettin' kinda antsy"; during sex, she coerced him into wearing
two condoms to desensitize him: "I don't want you coming so
damn early this time...Come on. I saw you on the 'Net. Why do you
think I accepted this date? You're a sure thing"
- the shocking, squirm-inducing bedroom scene of Stifler
(Seann William Scott) chugging down a brew (mixed with sperm deposited
there by Kevin), and then shortly later, embarrassingly vomiting
up the entire contents of his stomach onto a female conquest (off-screen)
- causing her to scream and flee down the stairs with stained clothes
- the seduction scene between Finch and Stifler's
mother Jeanine (Jennifer Coolidge), to the
tune of The Graduate's theme song
- Mrs. Robinson - Finch: "So,
uh, would you object if I said that you were quite striking?"
Jeanine: "Mr. Finch, are you trying to seduce me?" Finch: "Yes,
ma'am, I am." (She dragged him over to the pool table for sex)
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